Facebook: Love / Hate Relationship

Lately I have been feeling a bit annoyed with my Facebook friends. Unlike some other users, it has nothing to do with the systems itself -shit it’s free, who can complain right? It’s my own social cloud that is getting on my nerves.

First, their status updates seem like tag lines to soap operas.

The girls claim “Where would I be without him”, “I am your princess, you are my prince.” Who wants to read that?

Married couples hot tag lines are “Spent a great day with the baby, only two spit ups!”. What? Is that REALLY the most interesting piece of information in your life?

Then of course it always the unoriginal Monday and Tuesday updates, who just rotate “UGh it’s Monday!” and “Ya! It’s Friday!”. Makes me wonder if they have a career or still work hourly at Burger King.

Of course there are the several really cool things Facebook has brought my life. I’ve moved around quite a bit over the past 10 or so years, loosing a few good friends. Waking up this morning, Facebook left me a little love note in my email, stating yet another old friend found me. This time, it was one I wonder if died off and I missed the funeral.

So for every group of crappy, I really don’t know that person request (and some are darn persistent with their requests…like LEAVE me alone!), I find one golden friend from the past.

Thanks Facebook…I love you but damn you are annoying sometimes!

Our Own Tipping Point

We all reach points in our lives where we’ve just had enough. It’s time for a change.

We are all participants in our own tv show of life. We are the participants of The Biggest Loser, who have reached a tipping point that says “Something has got to change.” It might not be loosing weight, but it’s something in our lives that drag us down, burden our minds day in and day out - it’s the something that needs to change.

It’s American’s as a whole looking for a tipping point in Obama. It’s the worker who is tired of wrestling with the same workplace problems and becomes an entrepreneur. It’s the advertiser who pushes for brand placement on a new venue. It’s the ropes that tie you down to the same systematic thinking.

Snapping one day and brining us to build all the strength in the world to make change occur. Enough personal dedication and steam to power a whole city - It’s our own tipping point of change.

Veracious Moments

It’s the end of seven long days, to which several repeating moments helped concrete several truths I know:

1) Facebook is the friends you used to know, Twitter are for those you want to know better.
Repeating a Tweet, I find this to be very true. In the course of one week, I have been bothered by 10 friend requests on Facebook. It is an interruption since not one of these people actually “know me”. They are either friends of friends, or attended the same college, neither of which I constitute as substantial evidence to argue friend status. Twitter does allow me to stretch a hand out to those I don’t know but wish to suck their knowledge from.

2) Texting is NOT a conversation.
Email can be a great way to contact a potential client or prospect, but you will never be able to close the sale via email. You have to actually open your big fat mouth and SPEAK to the person, that is the only way to close the sale. Same with texting. There are people who understand texting is for quick drops of information, not full fledged conversations. The following is the lamest way to coax a conversation:
Text: how are you? Working from home?
Reply: Fine.
Text: What have you been up to? Hows work?
Reply: Great.
Text: Share some of the great?
*Phone turned off*
If I don’t reply to your text, it means the “conversation” is done. Get the hint.

3) Content is one thing, but connection is the key.
I will agree the outspoken self-declaration of cable repair men becoming SEO / social media experts over night, is getting old. There is a trend to which people are selling “knowledge” without any tangible service connected. You can go about anywhere and hear stories of companies paying thousands for SEO consultants to “tell” them what to do, but no doing with it. So, if SEO/SEM is bullshit, then your content is magically indexed right? Um, NO.

You can can create content all fucking day, night, week…but if you don’t use social media networks, (Twitter, cross-blogging, Digg, Stumble Upon, cross link, etc) your site will never really exists. So while “knowledge” workers may be a fading trend, there is an opportunity for real “workers” to put their thumb to the key board and do the grinding work for companies. I mean, how many CEO’s have time to spend all fucking day Twittering and run a company? (Besides social media CEO’s…hello…). There needs to be a balance, and those who offer a balance, can provide valuable service.

Being Positive During Blizzard Conditions

If you ever experience a blizzard then you know there are two options in dealing with the conditions: 1) accept the conditions and shovel the snow over and over again. 2) Sit in a heated house and just watch the snow build, crying and whining when you can’t get out of your house.

We all get blizzard conditions during our life. It’s when we get an extra load of “to-do” on top of the daily maintenance stuff. We can’t change the fact that life is sometimes harder, but we can control how we deal with it.

Recently a friend of mine gave birth to her second child. She has her mother, husband, and mother-in-law all there to help her in the first few weeks. On a recent conversation with her, in her tired voice she just kept mentioning how tired everyone is. The round the clock feeding schedule was broken down into teams, playing havoc with everyone’s energy level.

My friend made sure to express her gratitude for being lucky enough to have family around to help. She understands that when I gave birth to my only offspring, my situation was drastically different. I was lucky to give birth million miles away from family and friends, in a foreign country, all alone. During the c-section birth and for 6 weeks afterwards, I was the only source of care for myself and my child. I understand how tiresome feeding every 2 hours can be.

The difference in scenarios doesn’t make me “stronger” person. I know if she was in the same position, her internal instinct of survival would kick in. It’s inside every one of us. When there is no one else to rely on, we can accept life’s responsibility and conquer. It’s the choice between keeping positive or letting life drag you down.

There are times in life that I wish I had someone else to split duties with, just like an entrepreneur starting off. Most entrepreneurs aren’t lucky enough to have a sales person on staff to do the dreadful cold-calling, or accountant to figure out the cryptic IRS statements. All successful entrepreneurs just do the extra duties in stride. They do so because they look at the big picture. It doesn’t matter who does the billing, it has to be done. Just do it.

As companies and humans, evolve to encompass more than one person in our circle of life, do we start to become over reliant on others? How often do we focus on what other’s aren’t accomplishing to help us, rather then taking ownership of our lives and just doing it. In the bitter cold of winter, I wish I had someone to fill my gas tank for me. I dread standing out on the cold air pumping gas. The reality is, I have yet to train my dog on how to drive or pump gas. Until I can, it’s either I accept it as something I just have to do (regardless of how cold or hot it is) or I have no transportation.

Surely if I had someone else to rely on, I would want them to take care of it for me. At what point does my life responsibilities become the responsibilities of others? Really, never. Simply because you have someone else to lean on, doesn’t make it their responsibility to rise to the occasion every time. It’s ok to stand on your own and keep positive. In reality, the little blizzards of our lives are easily conquerable - you just have to keep positive.

What Does Your Voice Leave Behind?

We always hear about first impressions and how important it is to make it the best. Once you’ve gone past the first impression, you often see people in various moods or attitudes. The other night I found myself “hearing” voices in my head. It was the voices of the people around me, radiating long after our last conversation.

It’s all about what message you convey the strongest. In general people try to avoid causing the negative voices to come out, but sometimes it may seem no matter what you do, the voice prevails. This week alone, from blogs, clients, and coworkers, negative voices have prevailed. For example,
I was packing up my boss for a business trip, leaving a note where everything was packed, filling a notebook with directions etc. For the first time, I battled in my head with his voice. He’s a smart man, and takes great offense when others don’t take in consideration his abilities. So I heard him saying; “I can take care of myself you know. I do know how to get from point A to B.” in response to my prepetory information left.

On the other hand, if I didn’t leave a note informing him where the promo material was packed or where the business cards hid, I heard this, “Where the hell is everything? How am I suppose to know where this stuff is?”

It’s a no win situation. Both voices radiated in my head into the evening, leaving me to accept failure no matter what I did. At some point, you just say F&*($ it, and just stop giving a shit.

Sure everyone has their “tweaks” that get under their skin and irritate them. If you interact with a person long enough, you can certainly hear their voice of frustration. Most of the time you can also hear their laughter to counter the negativity. Sometimes, you can’t.

When you leave people, what voice do they hear you in? Do they only hear the constant negativity, discourse, and frustration? Or is there a balance of happiness and kindness? First impressions are great and all, but it’s what you leave behind is what is remembered.

Musical Memories

It’s amazing how a single song can bring back the most vivid memories regardless of how much time has passed. Typically, it’s those years in our twenties, which forever shaped our personality, beliefs, and goals that are marked by a musical cord.

Once in awhile, I’ll be flippen through radio stations in the car and land on song that instantly brings me right to the doorstep of a past experience. If I land on a Lynyrd Skynyrd song, my entire mind shifts back to my early twenties. I lived the majority of my twenties overseas which forever will be bonded with a select group of friends.

Lynyrd Skynyrd used to blare through my speakers of my black little sports car as we drove across the Japanese coast on summer days. 10 or so of us, would rise mid morning on a Saturday to head two hours south to camp on the coast. Japanese beaches are not regulated as most American beaches are. They resemble much of Texas’ South Padre Island, where you can drive right up on the beach settling feet from the shoreline.

My romantic interest and I used follow the pact of cars down in the morning. On the way home, we always took our own route home. A bit slower or faster than the others, just depending on the stops we took or the path. We never had a “goal” or specific outlined direction to take. We just went with how we felt that day.

Even today, years later, I can hear Lynyrd Skynryd and be transplanted back in my old Toyota. Sunroof back, sun glaring in our eyes, music blaring, and the smell of our cigarettes as we drove. It’s memories attached to a certain song, that will never be replaced by the present day. Doesn’t matter how old I get, where I live, car I drive, or whose in the passenger seat, because for those 9 min., I will always be driving in Japan with someone else.

Of Mice and Men

I found a picture of me playing standing behind one of those wooden cutouts painted as a mouse. It got me thinking how often we as humans, act like mice.

Mice lead a simple life, scavenging for food and keeping warm in a little hole they cut themselves. But, it is a life of constant fear. Tiny mice have the disadvantage of having most of the world towering above them. Even though mice are tiny compared to us humans, we are the ones running from them. Why? Read the rest of this entry