Definition of a “People Person”

What constitutes a person to a be a “People Person”? Several definitions include:

Dictionary.com : a person who likes interacting with others

Wiktionary.org: Someone who is happier or more skilled at dealing with people rather than things or concepts.

There is no argument that both definitions are similar, but I do believe there is room left for interpretation of what constitutes as “interacting”. There are two different ways in which a person can be defined as a “people person”, or more specific, reliance on people.

Type A: These individuals draw a great deal of self-confidence, pleasure, and source of meaning from interacting directly with other people. These would be the people who enjoy “touching” the lives of others directly or having a source of networked with others. Type A person may welcome other’s into their homes, schedule, or social network with ease and no hesitation. They actively seek out people to interact with. It’s a give and receive process of conversation or compliment resulting in fueling the “giver’s” self confidence and purpose of life.

Type B: These individuals do not feel the need to interact directly with large quantities or varieties of people. On the contrary, Type B people feel more comfortable coexisting in a large metropolitan area with many people around. They are more apt to live in an apartment or condo and feel comfortable sitting alone for coffee in a packed cafe then sitting with one other person in an empty park. Type B people may also be very private people. They do not require direct or close interaction with others to satisfy their sense of self-worth or confidence. Though they enjoy the energy of people around them, they tend to see a few close friends versus a large network.

Quite often we correlate the friendliest of people, to be considered a people person. It also takes a person who enjoys the sense of other’s within their proximity (but not necessarily directly interacting) to be a people person also. It would be obscene to draw the conclusion that a private person is not a people person. They might prefer anonymity, but feel most comfortable in a large group of strangers. Thus, it’s not just the “interaction” but varying degrees of proximity of people that defines what a people person is or is not.

Beauty Shop Slut

Yes, I am the neighborhood beauty shop slut. I have visited four different salons within a 5 mile radius in the past 12 months. After getting over the guilt from being less than faithful, I have learned quite a bit about my neighborhood through my multiple hair job partners.

I have moved into a sub culture of people who are anything but nomads. Every single hair stylist has said the same thing to me, almost verbatim, “I grew up here, and now I live two blocks from here. My parents live down the street, and my boyfriend/ husband grew up here too. We plan to stay here forever.”

My response is always the same “Oh. Have you ever been outside the area?” Always the same response in the same giddy tone “Nope!”.

I can’t imagine never living outside of your birth cocoon. Thus, I have come to the conclusion that where you have been and where you feel is “home”, should encompass people who have more like-experiences with you. It was a light on why I feel disconnected with my neighborhood culture. I have lived (more than 90 days) in four different locations (all geographically separated by hundreds of miles) in a span of eight years. This doesn’t make me better or smarter then my neighbor, but it sure gives me a different outlook on life, family, friends, and culture. It’s like I am bird who is trying to fit in with a bunch of turtles who stay in their shells. Not much in common.

The same extends to witnessing a huge divide in the values encompassed by Northerners and Southerners. If you stay long enough in Tennessee or Texas to get past that “Southern hospitality” you’ll soon witness a culture of people deep rooted in traditional family roles, football, and race. From the outside, it’s always a joke a city girl moving into the country or vice versa, but the real life cohesiveness doesn’t always encompass a happy ending.

I once believed the era of the Civil War and Woman Liberation was dead and gone, but I am wrong. Just like taking the Sex and the City foursome out of New York would be considered ill taste, asking a Northern bred liberal to settle in the south probably won’t fly. I wonder if it is unreasonable to turn down jobs and a future based on location knowing, location is more than just geographic codes but a completely different culture.

Of Mice and Men

I found a picture of me playing standing behind one of those wooden cutouts painted as a mouse. It got me thinking how often we as humans, act like mice.

Mice lead a simple life, scavenging for food and keeping warm in a little hole they cut themselves. But, it is a life of constant fear. Tiny mice have the disadvantage of having most of the world towering above them. Even though mice are tiny compared to us humans, we are the ones running from them. Why? Read the rest of this entry